Aaron Burr, Sir

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Aaron Burr, Sir

"Aaron Burr, Sir" – Hamilton, Burr, Laurens, Lafayette, and Mulligan


COMPANY] 1776. New York City

[HAMILTON] Pardon me. Are you Aaron Burr, sir?

[BURR] That depends. Who’s asking?

[HAMILTON] Oh, well, sure, sir I’m Alexander Hamilton, I’m at your service, sir I have been looking for you

[BURR] I’m getting nervous

[HAMILTON] Sir… I heard your name at Princeton. I was seeking an accelerated course of study when I got sort of out of sorts with a buddy of yours. I may have punched him. It’s a blur, sir. He handles the financials?

[BURR] You punched the bursar

[HAMILTON] Yes! I wanted to do what you did. Graduate in two, then join the revolution. He looked at me like I was stupid, I’m not stupid


So how’d you do it? How’d you graduate so fast?

[BURR] It was my parents’ dying wish before they passed

[HAMILTON] You’re an orphan. Of course! I’m an orphan God, I wish there was a war! Then we could prove that we’re worth more Than anyone bargained for…

[BURR] Can I buy you a drink?

[HAMILTON] That would be nice

[BURR] While we’re talking, let me offer you some free advice Talk less


[BURR] Smile more


[BURR] Don’t let them know what you’re against or what you’re for

[HAMILTON] You can’t be serious

[BURR] You wanna get ahead?


[BURR] Fools who run their mouths off wind up dead

[LAURENS] Yo yo yo yo yo! What time is it?


[BURR] Like I said…

[LAURENS] Show time! Show time! Yo! I’m John Laurens in the place to be! Two pints o’ Sam Adams, but I’m workin’ on three, uh! Those redcoats don’t want it with me! Cuz I will pop chick-a pop these cops till I’m free!

[LAFAYETTE] Oui oui, mon ami, je m’appelle Lafayette! The Lancelot of the revolutionary set! I came from afar just to say “Bonsoir!” Tell the King “Casse toi!” Who’s the best? C’est moi!

[MULLIGAN] Brrrah brraaah! I am Hercules Mulligan Up in it, lovin’ it, yes I heard ya mother said “Come again?”


[MULLIGAN] Lock up ya daughters and horses, of course It’s hard to have intercourse over four sets of corsets…


[LAURENS] No more sex, pour me another brew, son! Let’s raise a couple more…


[LAURENS] Well, if it ain’t the prodigy of Princeton college!

[MULLIGAN] Aaron Burr!

[LAURENS] Give us a verse, drop some knowledge!

[BURR] Good luck with that: you’re takin’ a stand You spit. I’m ‘a sit. We’ll see where we land


[LAURENS] Burr, the revolution’s imminent. What do you stall for?

[HAMILTON] If you stand for nothing, Burr, what’ll you fall for?

[MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE/LAURENS] Ooh Who you? Who you? Who are you?

[MULLIGAN/LAFAYETTE/LAURENS] Ooh, who is this kid? What’s he gonna do?